Guest Post: How a Monolingual Family Became a Bilingual Family

November 27, 2019

ADAM’S NOTE: Over the past few years, Tiara Harris has sometimes shared video clips with me of her super-cute kids speaking Japanese and I came to admire the very proactive efforts she is making so that she and her children can both become bilingual in this language and their native English. As a result of the success she’s experiencing, Tiara is also becoming a growing force at YouTube with a variety of helpful and appealing videos at her Chocolate Sushi Roll channel. Thank you for sharing your encouraging story with us, Tiara! And keep up all your good efforts, for your family and for families out in the world!

Tiara and her children

Tiara Harris is a native English speaker from the U.S. state of Georgia raising two bilingual children. As a military family, they frequently must relocate, but Tiara is determined to maintain the goal of having a bilingual family. Currently, they live in Japan and Tiara is making efforts to foster her young children’s ability in Japanese while studying Japanese herself and teaching English to Japanese children. She created a YouTube channel, called Chocolate Sushi Roll, to inspire other monolingual families to be brave and take the leap toward bilingualism.

Konnichiwa! (That’s hello in Japanese!)

If you had met me four years ago, I could only have greeted you in English and (maybe) Spanish…from the few Spanish words I learned from sleeping through my Spanish class in high school. I wasn’t interested in learning another language and never realized the opportunities and depth that can come with it.

Moving to Japan

I am—well, was—a monolingual mom from a completely monolingual family. We’re a military family and, to our dismay—at least at first—we became faced with relocating to Japan. To be honest, I dreaded going and was even refusing to go until one month before the move because I love living in America and I wanted to stay close to my family. But my husband urged me to come with him so he wouldn’t have to be stationed in Japan by himself.

So we went to Okinawa in 2014 and we were there for two years. I became a tour guide for Americans and learned about the culture and history and a lot of fun facts for the 30-minute bus tours. But I still had no interest in learning to speak Japanese.

Then, during our second year in Okinawa, we were blessed with a baby boy, Jason.

And my whole perspective changed.

At that point, because Jason was born in Japan, I decided that he should speak the language. And, in fact, before I even realized it, this was already starting to happen. I had been taking Jason to baby play classes with native Japanese mothers and their babies. One day I noticed that when the teacher said to clap, Jason clapped. And when the teacher said to clean up, his little hands started reaching to clean up. I was so surprised! This baby is learning Japanese!

By then, though, Jason was already a year old and it was time for us to return to America. And I was now pregnant with a baby girl.

Tiara and her son

Returning to America

In America, Jason continued to use Japanese words. My goal then became for us to be a bilingual household and become fluent in Japanese. I didn’t want Jason to lose this gift. So I began studying hard and trying to speak Japanese with my children each day. When I couldn’t find the words, I used books to help me say what I wanted to say. For instance, if the mother in a story used a certain phrase when she told her children to clean up, I would do the same. I wrote these phrases in a notebook and used them with my children at the appropriate time.

I realized that I didn’t need to be fluent to help my children learn Japanese. I just needed to stay one step ahead of them.

At first I started with the simple question-and-answer pair: “What’s this? It’s a _____.” In this way, making use of children’s books and my smartphone, we were able to build our vocabulary and achieve a baby’s range of language development. Next, I researched what native Japanese families use to engage their children in the language. It’s important for me to cover the sort of words and expressions that Japanese children actually use, which can’t easily be found in a textbook. So I ordered the Shimajiro Kodomo Challenge, a monthly subscription that includes age-appropriate toys, stories, a DVD, and activity books. I studied these materials and used them with my kids. We also had the chance to be a homestay family for some Japanese high school students. It was only for a weekend, but we enjoyed every minute of it and we hope we can host more Japanese students in the future.

Tiara and her daughter

Attending a Japanese school

My goal was to get Jason accepted into a Saturday school in a nearby city when he turned four. A Saturday school is generally for Japanese families who come to America for a year or two, in connection with their work, then return to Japan. But during the time these families are there, they want their children to keep up with their Japanese and the Japanese school curriculum. The Japanese government funds these Saturday schools to support families in this way.

Typically, there are no children of other nationalities at these Saturday schools. But Jason passed the interview process and was accepted. It was a proud mama moment for me! I then drove four hours, round-trip, every Saturday so he could attend. The class for four year olds was only 90 minutes long, with play time at the park afterwards. I was praying that my husband would be able to get us back to Japan because Jason was expressing the desire to go to a real Japanese school. He really enjoyed the program and being around other kids who spoke the same two languages as he did.

Tiara and her kids

Heading back to Japan

Earlier this year, we got the good news: We were returning to Japan! Although the spots were limited, when people learned about Jason, it was a unanimous decision. And that one decision will forever affect Jason’s (and his little sister’s) future.

So Jason is now enrolled in a Japanese preschool. No one speaks English there, but Jason fits right in with the other kids. It’s hard for people to believe that we just arrived in Japan in March because he speaks like a native Japanese child. I’m still working hard on my own Japanese, but hopefully in another year I’ll have made enough progress to start introducing some Spanish, too.

Tiara and her kids in Japan

Inspiring other families

When I first began our bilingual journey in 2015, I couldn’t find a lot of information about people in our sort of situation. Most families seemed to have a native-speaking parent of the target language. But our case was so different. I didn’t know much Japanese myself, but I was determined to teach my children Japanese while we were living in America. Day after day, I did what I could with books, our subscription for children’s materials, and my own growing ability in the language. I would even travel to other cities for a play date in Japanese because I knew how important that interaction with other children would be. And every time we moved (as a military family we move a lot!), finding a Japanese community was always one of my highest priorities.

I recently started a YouTube channel, called Chocolate Sushi Roll, to inspire other monolingual families to be brave and take the leap toward bilingualism. In my videos, I tell monolingual families that any parent is capable of teaching his or her child another language. I also try to empower bilingual parents to maintain their family heritage by teaching their children their native language. I hope my efforts can help other parents—and, in particular, parents in America—be successful in their bilingual goals.

How about you? What do you think of Tiara’s story? Feel free to share your thoughts with her by adding a comment below!

1 Sylwia November 27, 2019 at 3:57 pm

Tiara is a wonderful example that I can follow my dreams and nothing prevents me from language development in my family. Thank you, Tiara!

Reply

2 Tiara Harris November 28, 2019 at 1:24 am

Thank you for reading! Your support means so much to me!!

Reply

3 Amy November 27, 2019 at 4:58 pm

Amazing story! Hats off to you Tiara! And all the best for the continuation of your family’s bilingual journey! :)

Reply

4 Tiara Harris November 28, 2019 at 1:26 am

Thank you! I will take all of your sweet well wishes and put them to use as you might know keeping the balance and momentum is #work but worth it!

Reply

5 Betsy Riley November 28, 2019 at 6:43 pm

This is amazing! I have felt the same about teaching my kids Arabic, also a new language for me. Sadly, I have almost given up on my 10, 7, and 4 year olds. :( But your persistence is inspiring to me. I need to find my inner Moana!!

Reply

6 Tiara Harris November 28, 2019 at 11:53 pm

Yesss!!! I find that all it takes is for you to have just one good day out the week. Just ONE! where you feel energized, happy, rested and calm. On that day, write down on paper (the old fashion way lol) 5 new simple phrases (that are good for kids to say in the target language). Pick one fun family game, i.e. Uno, slime making, race cars, whatever your kids are into. Then on this happy day play undistracted with your children, using the new phrases building and blending it into what they already know. Act out the phrases and scenarios and just have fun. Live in that moment. If they are laughing, they are learning and they are wanting to learn. Then the rest of the week can go on as usual but being mindful to emphasize those new phrases, words, and grammar points. Hope this helps! You got this, momma!! All kids want is their favorite adult’s undivided attention. When they connect language learning with the funniest times with Mom, the rest will flow easily. Good luck! Let me know how your journey is going from time to time.

Reply

7 Adam November 29, 2019 at 8:02 am

This is very good advice, Tiara! It’s so important, particularly for younger children, to make the target language as playful and engaging as possible so that our kids will associate this language with fun and good feelings.

Reply

8 Ramona November 29, 2019 at 11:59 am

Tiara you are awesome! Thank you for sharing your story, your children are very fortunate to have you.

Reply

9 Tiara Harris November 29, 2019 at 9:05 pm

Aaawwww Shucks **blush** Thank you Ramona!

Reply

10 Rocio December 19, 2019 at 11:23 am

Hello. I’m from Argentina. I like your experience, I’m native in Spanish and I want teach English to my baby. If you need phrases in Spanish, you can write to me and I will gladly answer you.

Reply

11 Tiara December 24, 2019 at 2:25 pm

Hello! Thank you so much Rocio! I will extend that favor to you as well. If you need help with phrases in English, let me know and I will be happy to assist in parenting phrases, baby songs, and recommendations. There are so many ESL (English as a second language) resources. Thank you for reading my story. I will teach my children Spanish as their “second language” as soon as my Japanese reaches fluency *fingers crossed I’m ready in a year and a half.*

Thanks again.

Tiara

Reply

12 Errol December 24, 2019 at 1:39 pm

I love your story so much. Going from being on the sidelines to a very much involved learner.

I studied abroad in Tokyo three years ago and haven’t really used my Japanese since. I felt so discouraged from using the language but after I had my son, I felt inspired to try again! Reading your story is even more inspirational. Thank you for sharing your journey and ganbatte!

Reply

13 Tiara December 24, 2019 at 2:22 pm

Hello! Yes! Thank you so much for sharing that with me. You should definitely jump back in with two feet. When your son says his first Japanese word you will get a whole new burst of motivation you didn’t even know you had. Trust me you will enjoy the process more with your favorite little person in tote.

Good luck and I’m glad I was able to inspire by sharing!

Reply

14 Tene March 13, 2020 at 12:05 pm

Great job Tiara. And your children are absolutely gorgeous. Good luck on their journey. Your children are blessed to have such a forward thinking , open and a brilliant mommy. My family is also bilingual and my son wishes to learn Korean as his third language ( I have zero clue about this language) . But this is certainly inspiring. Thank you for sharing.

Reply

15 Tiara March 13, 2020 at 4:00 pm

Thank you so much for your loving comment. I feel all the love, and hope that you have fun learning Korean, attempting to cook the food, and enjoying the search for friends. (Try the oriental markets in your city.) Looking forward to hearing about an update.

Reply

Comments, please! (Your email address won't be displayed.)

Previous post:

Next post: